The Hot Topic

It doesn’t take a genius to notice that Facebook is completely full of people whinging about politics at the moment. And I’d just like to point out – look on the bright side. Politicians are hot. It’s a hard thing to admit, but I really do mean it. I’d love to see the Houses of Parliament Fit Finder – “Male. Blonde hair. Jolly spiffing mop of golden locks, and bloody funny at that. I’d like to Boris your Johnson”. Yes, please. And I know I’m not the only one enjoying the Nick Clegg/David Cameron love in a slightly perverse way – you know you like it too. There is just something inherently sexy about these men in power. They may be balding, they may be a little portly, but I just can’t resist.

Others agree with me – in New York, Barack Obama was recently stopped by a woman who proclaimed, “You're a hottie with a smokin' little body.” She tells it how it is. The President, with good humour, replied that his wife would be watching, and his admirer responded “That's all right. Hi, Michelle - eat your heart out!” I wish I had her guts – I’d never leave Westminster alone. The great thing about this story is that it is helping remove the stigma of being attracting to politicians. I mean, looking back at politicians of the past, we haven’t exactly been blessed. For example, I’m not quite feeling that George Bush or John Major vibe – they’re not exactly the man candy that we’ve managed to get ourselves in 2010. I’m waiting for the shooting of “The Cabinet Cuties 2011” naked calendar to get started. Forget expenses scandals, they’d make enough money to pay off government debt in the opening week.

Of course, I’m not claiming that every current politician is the new George Clooney; in the case of Gordon Brown, I’m more than willing to step away. But surely we can take something from this Obama story, and bring something magical to the UK. A sexual revolution, with political pin-ups openly accepted for the hunks that they are. Think about it – instead of throwing eggs at David Cameron, why can’t we throw our knickers? Forget the R-Patz obsession; I want a massive poster of BoJo on my bedroom wall. And when you hear about a ‘hung’ parliament – well, I’m sure you get the idea. Still, if this is too much to ask of people, then I understand. Maybe the world just isn’t ready for this yet. But I do have just one, small request. Can you at least stop bloody whinging on Facebook?

Sorry...

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The Yorkling

Movies by Mood

‘Oh my God, I’m never going to meet Mister Right, I’m going to be alone. FOREVER.’

The Notebook:
This is the one film that literally makes me cry every single time I watch it. So, make that around eighty-three times. If you’ve just gone through a messy break-up, or even if you’re just feeling a little lonely, then this film is perfect. You may find yourself a little jealous of the immaculate love between the central characters (and secretly want to kill Rachel McAdams) but if you can get past that then it’s definitely worth a watch. From the famous kiss in the rain, to the sob-inducing ending (that I won’t give away), this film should hopefully persuade you that there is someone for you, you will find them, and you won’t end up living with eight cats and slight insanity. Even if you don’t look like Rachel McAdams.

‘I want to snuggle up in bed and not move all day’

Any of the classic Disney musical cartoon films: The Lion King, Aladdin, Beauty and the Beast, The Little Mermaid…
If you’re taking a sick day because you’re actually sick, then you can enjoy listening to the incredible songs. If you’re taking a sick day because you just didn’t want to go in, then you can join in, at the top of your voice. You know you know all the words. Singing aside, there is something incredibly feel-good about these films. Whether it’s the childhood nostalgia associated with them, or the fact that they’re just bloody good films, there’s always an excuse for a bit of Disney.

‘Oh boy, I need to get drunk…’

The Room:
Okay, so this is more about the drinking game that goes with The Room, as opposed to the actual film itself, but the point still stands. The Room is one of the most appalling films ever made, and perfect for watching with a group of friends and enough booze to go round. The full set of rules is quite substantial (google ‘The Room drinking game’ if you want to play), but consists of classics such as ‘Drink every time Denny’s behaviour makes you uncomfortable’, and shout ‘BITCH’ every time the character Lisa comes on screen, amongst others. You may not remember the film the next day – but perhaps that’s a good thing.

‘I need some quality time with the girlies, pronto’

Sex and The City:
Best enjoyed with some seriously girly cocktails (preferably with the little umbrellas and all the trimmings) and a tub of chocolate ice cream each, this film is perfect for those girly, gossipy nights in. Even if you put the plot aside, the fashion alone makes it worth watching – although, I must warn you that it may lead to expensive impulse online purchases, if enough alcohol is consumed. Throw in those classic characters that all self-respecting girls know and love, and you’ve got yourself the makings of a great night. If you really want to go for it, then Bridget Jones is the perfect film to follow – along with some Cosmopolitans, of course.

‘I am a man. A MANLY MAN’
Rocky and/or Rambo:
Men always need confirmation that they are, indeed, men. Cue some sort of poker night, with whiskey and cigars, and the token ‘man film’ – Rocky. It’s got everything – fighting, fighting, and more fighting. Plus, er, Sylvester Stallone. One warning – if the host of the evening happens to own the whole Rocky collection (as any real man would, of course) then you may end up watching them all, as no man wants to be the first person to suggest turning it off. As long as you don’t start on Rambo afterwards, however, then you should be okay. But of course you’ll be okay – you’re a man.

In with the old, in with the new..

As a second year moving into third term, I’ve realised a number of things. Not only that free prawn crackers at a nightclub is possibly one of the greatest things ever invented, but (possibly) more importantly that I have met some people that I hope I’ll remain friends with forever. I know it’s cliché, and that we don’t really know how long these friendships will last for, but I’m optimistic – plus I have so much dirt on them that they can’t even think about ditching me.

The only problem is trying to keep the friendships I made before coming to university – the ones that I also thought would last forever. I was lucky enough to have an extremely tight-knit group in secondary school – although this did mean I literally had four friends – and I loved them all. Thankfully I still do, and we have managed to keep in contact throughout term time and holidays, but I can’t help but think about what could happen in the future.

It’s hard enough going ten weeks without seeing someone – what if they move abroad? What happens when they get married? What about when they have children? I’m not going to lie – it’s a scary thought. The essay I’ve got due in is frightening enough, let alone thinking about a job, marriage, babies... Crikey. All I hope for is that I’ll still have those friends to make it less daunting. And to come dancing with me when I’m too old to get those free prawn crackers.

Why we'd rather go to the schools on television

1.
One of the greatest things about these schools is the students’ amazing ability to bring out perfectly synchronised impromptu song and dance routines, and still manage to look cool doing it. Those long days spent practising the dance moves to Single Ladies just don’t seem to have the same effect. These guys just do it so much better; from McKinley High School in Glee, bursting with Broadway tunes and bitchy cheerleaders, to Rydell High in Grease, with the sassy Pink Ladies and sexy (…go on, admit it) T-Birds.

2.
But if singing and dancing is too much for a school to provide, then not to worry; most movie schools tend to make up for it with beautiful teachers. Bradley Cooper in The Hangover is quite simply gorgeous; I’d definitely go back to high school if it meant I could stare at him all day. Hell, detention would be fun! Mr Schu in Glee also isn’t half bad; and, although he may not be the sexiest teacher to date, Robin Williams in Dead Poets Society is just the nicest, loveliest person ever.

3.
Some of the goings-on at these schools are just fantastically surreal – Back To The Future, anyone? Marty goes back in time, when his parents are both in high school, and has to simultaneously reject his mother whilst helping his dad hook up with her; sheer brilliance. Although this very specific situation may not be top on the list of things I’d like to do, going back in time would definitely be up there. Only after impromptu singing and dancing, of course.

4.
No list of movie schools would be complete without a reference to Hogwarts. That’s right; the one and only School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, attended by a certain Harry Potter. It’s hard to know where to start with this one, but somewhere that offers lessons in Potions, Charms and Transfiguration, to name a few, clearly beats boring old Maths and English. There are also nine secret passages, a Forbidden Forest, and you get to travel via the Hogwarts Express. So, what are we waiting for? I’ll meet you on Platform 9 ¾.

5.
The fantastic ways students move from high school to university. Even recently, in the last series of Skins, both Pandora and Thomas managed to get a scholarship to Harvard – in Thomas’ case, by running really fast. Honestly. They’re not the only characters to get into Harvard unconventionally – Elle in Legally Blonde was accepted after sending in a ‘film essay’. A top degree and fabulous clothes? Very jealous indeed.

6.
Speaking of fabulous clothes, the fashion in these movie high schools is incredible. Those mini-skirts and feather boas from Clueless? Just amazing. Not to mention the crop tops and trainers in 10 Things I Hate About You, along with the huge prom dresses, platform-sandal hybrids, and far too many white trousers. On second thoughts, maybe it’s the type of fashion to be admired from a distance…

7.
One element of all high school movies that quite simply never fails to impress me is the ‘geeky makeover’ scene, à la Clueless and Princess Diaries. If only all of us slightly nerdy girls could have some miracle sleepover where it turns out we were actually pretty damn hot along, and we just needed some contact lenses and a decent haircut to transform into the next Scarlett Johansson. Sigh. Maybe then Bradley Cooper would be interested.

8.
It’s brilliant how horrible people always get what they deserve. In real life, the school bully tends to get away with it, but, in the movies, they almost always seem to get their comeuppance. Whether it’s Regina in Mean Girls getting hit by a bus, or Kathryn having her previously flawless reputation destroyed in Cruel Intentions, we love to see the nasty girls get punished.

9.
And, last but not least, the wild and often downright crazy parties that always go down in movie schools and colleges have to get a mention. Ryan Reynolds in Van Wilder is testament to this rule of thumb, as well as showing that students in movies are clearly way more attractive than they could ever be in real life. American Pie – and all the spin-offs – also epitomises the spirit of ‘partying hard’… although certain scenes with an apple pie may stand out more. Or Stifler drinking ‘tainted’ beer. Or Finch and a pool table. On second thoughts, perhaps it’s best we don’t go to movie high schools after all…

For Film24

Book, Line and Sinker: The Literary Revival That’s Reeled Us In.

Gok Wan, the cast of Wicked, and the York English department; what could they possibly have in common? I’ll give you a clue – it’s not their dress sense. In fact, they are all helping contribute towards the current literary revival, apparent in recent months. At the end of January, earlier this year, the iPad was unveiled, along with a new and extensive iTunes library, leading the way for literature to become technologically relevant. In terms of online opportunities, the success of Txt Lit (www.txtlit.co.uk) shows the appeal of creative writing in a modern way. It holds a unique monthly contest, challenging contestants to write a story based on a certain theme, within 160 characters – the length of an SMS text from a mobile phone. Clever, right?


However, e-books and ridiculously short stories aside, paper and ink books are rapidly increasing in popularity. In popular media, this is reflected in the Channel 4 programme, TV Book Club, which was first aired at the end of January. The premise of the show involves Gok Wan, along with other celebrities including Jo Brand, Dave Spikey, Nathaniel Parker and Laila Rouass, discussing and reviewing a different book each week. The term ‘celebrity’ may be a tad tenuous here, but nonetheless, with the debut episode reaching an impressive daytime peak average audience of around 350,000 viewers, this televised book club highlights a new popular interest in reading, and the beginning of a literary resurgence for this generation.


It’s not, however, simply the reading aspect of literature that has proved popular so far this year – creative writing is making a comeback. The importance of introducing creative and imaginative outlets early on can be seen in the launch of the Young Writers’ Award. Former Children’s Laureate Michael Morpurgo, with the support of the musical Wicked, is launching this contest as a re-embodiment of the WH Smith Young Writers’ Competition, which was discontinued twenty years ago. Clearly the relevance of creative writing is being placed in the foreground – and, if you need any more convincing, well-known previous winners of this contest include Helena Bonham Carter and Kate Beckinsale; clearly proof that it pays to be poetic.


If this seems a little too childish – to be fair, the competition is open to those as young as five – then there are more sophisticated literary trends also on the rise, providing a more adult approach to literature. The most successful of these appear to combine a social night out with a passion for reading – and a dash of alcohol for good measure, of course. An example of these modern literary endeavours is apparent in the book-reading nights that are held at Shoreditch House Literary Salon in east London – a place which claims that ‘not since the Marquis de Sade has reading been this sexy.’ Cocktails and Coleridge – sounds like the making of a great night to me. And, according to Facebook at least, over 1,500 people agree. The future of book clubs may lie in these ‘literary salons’ – showing that literature can evolve in a way that makes it both approachable and enjoyable, and not simply for an educational environment… Thank goodness.


On a smaller scale, or within our own campus, to be specific, the effects of this literary revival can clearly be seen. At York, the English department has introduced an annual anthology, The Looking Glass, and there is even a newly founded Creative Writing society. Combined with the increased interest on a national scale, this could mark the beginning of an entire literary revolution – or make reading and writing a little more popular, at least.


But why is creative writing making such a comeback? Former Children’s Laureate Michael Morpurgo believes that “it allows people to really say what they want to say and in a form that suits them. It's not a rigid rule that they need to follow or something they have to do to get to the next stage of their education. It's much freer and allows them to be themselves perhaps.” Michael also feels that not only is creative writing experiencing a revival, but creativity of all kinds may benefit from this new-found interest, saying that “most of us find our own creative outlet, that suits our feelings. Some will do it by writing, some by talking, some by dancing and painting. I think it's something about freedom to express.”

Yet can this resurgence be maintained? Michael believes that unfortunately “we are still hamstrung by the limitation of the testing and exam system in schools which very often smother creativity”, perhaps threatening the future of the interest in writing. However, he also extols the virtues of encouraging personal writing, explaining that “it's a good sign that an award such as Wicked Young Writers has been established to allow young people to write what they want to write and have an outlet for creativity.”


So, what are you waiting for? All you have to do is pick up a pen, or even get on your phone, in the case of Txt Lit. You might just have the opportunity to win some cash for yourself as well! And if writing doesn’t quite appeal, then just grab a book from the library, or go along to a trendy night in Shoreditch to enjoy a sneaky glass of wine (or four..) along with some exclusive readings. The worst that can happen is writers’ block or a disappointing ending – and it’s worth it.

First Steps

For Vogue competition; the theme was 'a personal memory'

My very first word was ‘shoe’. It was clear and distinct, and I’m assured that my mother didn’t translate some vague shoe-sounding word into the real thing - it was truly the word ‘shoe’. I had just been given my first pair - or the first pair I could actually wear, at least. My parents had already purchased little pairs of Doc Martens and Converse that I was yet to grow into; clearly my fascination with fashion was thrust upon me at an early age. I still absolutely adore shoes, and am the proud owner of a wardrobe full of fabulous footwear. Unfortunately, much like when I uttered my first word, I am still unable to master walking - in high-heels, at least. Yet, there seems to be something magical about childhood memories that have made an imprint on our adult life.


When I was younger we had a larder under the stairs, with a little mesh-covered window facing onto the garden, keeping it cold. I loved this larder, covered in glow-in-the-dark moons and stars, and I would go and sit in it during every single game of hide-and-seek, without fail. I may have often been the first one found, but I didn’t care - this was before I discovered my competitive nature, which made its first appearance but a few years later. I could’ve spent light-years in there, with those glow-in-the-dark stars; journeying through space, discovering unknown planets - and stealing cake, of course. My mother was an avid baker, and so we’d constantly have mountains of delicious, freshly made cakes and breads piled up in the larder. She would always encourage us children to help her bake a cake - and then have a mental breakdown and send us all away again half-way through, when we had icing sugar in our hair, up our noses, and pretty much everywhere but on the cake. I still enjoy a spot of baking every now and again - although nowadays I manage to keep the ingredients in the bowl and out of my hair. Well, most of the time, anyway.


The potting-shed in our back garden, which was lovingly referred to as my Wendy House, was another place where I spent many happy hours. My mother had painted the walls so it would look like the inside of a real house, with drawn-on kitchen worktops, and a dining room table and chairs. Tragically, I took the ‘real house’ element slightly too far, and tried to wash down the table and sides with a soapy cloth. This meant the walls looked less like a real house, and more like a poor imitation Picasso painting - but I loved it anyway - I just didn’t clean it again. Unfortunately this horrific ordeal stayed with me, as even to this day I often refuse to do any cleaning and tidying, all because of this childhood trauma.. Ahem.


The Wendy House led out into the back garden, where I would play with my little brother and sister, Arthur and Annie, all summer long. To be honest, this would often consist of me watching Annie picking up snails, licking them, and putting them back, or trying to stop her from eating ladybirds (or her own foot). Luckily, our sisterly adventures now consist of shopping and Starbucks, rather than snails and saliva; although she continues to have an adventurous palate, to this day.

My first ‘boyfriend’ was called Charles. He was the typical class stud, even at the tender age of seven - blonde hair, blue eyes, and absolutely no brains whatsoever. He also had a rather runny nose, that I never saw completely dry. Not quite what I look for in a boyfriend these days, but it worked a charm in primary school. He gave me my first kiss, and I taught him the alphabet. How romantic. Although to be fair, nowadays I have to teach boyfriends a lot more than just the alphabet - no, you can’t put a metal can in the microwave, and yes, pasta needs to be cooked in water. I suppose some things never change.


I always did like to be in charge of the kitchen; or of my own play kitchen and oven, at least. As well as making a multitude of meals using only leaves and grass - a right little Nigella Lawson already - I also enjoyed lying with my head in the oven. I honestly don’t know why I did this; personally I like to think of it as showing my literary tendencies at a young age already - perhaps more Plath than Lawson. All I can hope for now is that I’ll manage to have more success in my literary endeavours than I gave myself credit for as a six-year-old…