Determination and Intoxication

Latest Booze News from the BBC.

Apparently, all-you-can-drink offers and speed-drinking competitions may soon be banned from our good old locals, in order to crack down on alcohol abuse. Interesting.

Now, I don't know about you, but instead of worrying about this threat against our right to get absolutely bladdered, I'm more curious about where these offers and competitions take place. My local pub offers overpriced lager and watered down vodka; I don't need to drink a glass of water in between each drink, the landlord provides that in my double voddy Diet Coke already!

And yet I still manage to get drunk. I guess if there's a will, there's a way. Or perhaps if there's a predrinks on cheap booze at my house beforehand, there's a way.
I suppose it's things like that that have led to this concept that keeps popping up; to raise the price of alcohol in general, in an attempt to stop binge drinking and prevent children from buying booze at 'pocket money prices'.
If people want to get drunk, people will get drunk.

I'm a university student; I am the absolute authority on alcohol, alcohol abuse, and everything in between. Trust me on this. We will drink anything. My housemates have worked their way through port & Coke (apparently not too bad), Baileys & Coke (that curdles. should've realised that), and some strange black stuff in a dusty bottle. Still don't know what that was.

The point is, nothing will hold us back. If the price of vodka rockets and I have to resort to drinking beer (so many calories, dontcha know), then so be it.

Because, as God is my witness, I refuse to see the end of binge-drinking as we know it. Be proud, my fellow boozers. Alcohol is your friend. And indeed, alcohol helps you make friends. Nobody likes to admit it, but it's true. That's why Fresher's Week is so ridiculously alcohol infused. It's far too awkward to talk to new people sober. Bring out the booze, and everybody is bestest buds! To be honest, if it wasn't for alcohol, I don't think I would have any housemates.

So, politicians, raise our drinks prices if you must, and cancel these myserious speed-drinking competitions, and all-you-can-drink deals (but please tell me where they are first), but they won't work. With the power of fake ID, for our young followers, or the magic of a student loan, we will get drunk. And we will love it.